Secrets And Lies
by Starrwater
Summary: What happens when a FBI agent's past catches up with her? How will she react? Who will be there to help her through all the pain? Most importantly, will anything be the same after her friends find out the truth about her? Rated M for later Chapters.
1. Trust No One

**YAY! **Here's the first chapter. ENJOY

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Chapter One

Secrets And Lies

"We all have secrets. Some bigger, and some darker then others."

-Unknown.

I was at home, waiting for my boyfriend to get home from wherever he was tonight. Most nights he ends up going out for hours and hours. Not returning until it was about three or so in the morning. Most nights I would just go to sleep. But tonight I wanted to wait up for him. I spent all day going to stores, trying to pick out the perfect outfit for tomorrow night's date. And I was really excited to see him tonight. Though I don't know why, I have butterflies in my stomach. I've never had a problem with the butterflies before. And it's not like tomorrow was our first date or anything. I mean, we have been together for about two years now. But something was telling me that tomorrow was going to change my life.

I glanced at the clock, and noticed I had just a little under four hours, before he would be home. So I decided to pull out my favorite show, and put it in. I was playing an awesome game on my while I watched. I was on my seventh episode in the series, when I heard a car pulling up. The strange thing was there were no lights on. I turned the TV off, and threw my covers off. Then I slipped on my flip flops, and walked over to the window. I saw my boyfriend, and other person, climb out of the car. I watched as I saw them go to the trunk of the car, and lift the trunk. I could heard their voices, traveling towards the windows.

"Dude, she sure is a beauty." The other person was saying.

I waited for my boyfriend to reply back. But after a few seconds the only reply, from him, was, "Wait here. I'm going to make sure she's asleep." He stated, as she walked away from the car.

I don't know why, but I quickly looked around, and ran out of the bedroom. Then I ran into the kitchen area, towards the back door, near the table. I kneed down by the chair, and waited for the front door to open. Then I saw my boyfriend walk through the door, heading towards the bedroom. While he was in there, I reached up, and grabbed the nearest knife that was on the counter. Then, I sink back to the ground, just in time to see him coming back heading towards the door.

"Must be at a friends house. Her phone's gone." I heard him shout.

"Are you sure?" the other called.

"Yeah, she normally leaves her phone on the bed if she's still home. If it's not in the room, she's gone. Besides everything was turned off." I heard him reply.

"Well let's get this started then." the other said.

I strained to hear more, but all I could hear was the shuffling of feet. I waited for about two to five minutes but, no one came inside the house. I slowly got up, and walked backwards towards the back door. Once I reached the door, I slipped out. Then I slowly crept towards the front of the house. I poked my head around the corner of the house. And looked to see if I could see anyone. But I couldn't. I rushed over to the car, and took the knife to the two tires on the left side, then I picked up a rock, and throw it at the house. When the rock broke through the window, our alarm system went off. I stayed low to the ground, and waited for my boyfriend to come check it out. And I didn't have to wait to long.

"Dude what was that?" Asked the other guy that was with him.

"I don't know. Let's go check it out." my boyfriend stated, as I heard them running towards the house. Once I saw them go through the door, I ran into the shed.

"Please, don't." Begged a girl that was tied to chair, and blind folded. I quickly undid the ropes. Then I grabbed her, and ran out of the shed. I could see the lights on in the house I ran away, pulling the girl with me. Once we got about four houses down the street, I pulled her into a backyard, and hid. I pulled the blind fold off her eyes.

"We need to be quite, I'm going to call the cops. Hopefully they'll be here soon." I stated, pulling my phone out of my pocket.

"Who are you?" She asked scared.

"I'm a helpful person." I said after a few minutes trying to decide what to say.

"You're with them aren't you?" She asked, as she started to back away from me.

"No not like…."

"Help!" She screamed, running away.

"Wait!" I exclaimed, trying to catch up to her, but she was running to fast, and in down the middle of the street.

Which wasn't smart. I jumped over the fence, and ran down the street, but took a quick left, to get off the main line. And went into a different neighborhood. Luckily I lived in a smallish town. So it wasn't hard to meet people. No hard part is finding out where they live. I saw headlights coming, and quickly ducked behind some bushes. And waited for them to past. But the car was driving slow. I peeked through the bushes, and saw my car, driving slowly down the road. I hadn't thought to slash my tires. But I also forgot that I didn't have my keys on me either. Normally, I don't leave the house with them. Come to think of it, I never leave my house with out my purse either. But I guess when it's life and death, you only grab your phone. Nothing else matters.

I could faintly hear screaming, from behind me. Coming from the same direction as the girl ran from. I saw, my car flipping around in a driveway before speeding off. I counted to ten, before jumping up, and taking off running. Another good thing about a small town. It wasn't hard to find anything. Since most places were on Main Street. You just have to know the cross street, so you know where to go. Other wise you'd be trying to find a store, and not know which cross street to turn down, to get to it. I kept running, taking allies, and side streets, trying to avoid the main roads as much as possible. I finally got the police station, after running for twenty-five minutes or so. But when I got there, I saw my car parked in parking lot. I swore, before hiding in the shadows.

"Thanks, I just hope nothing's happened to her." I heard my boyfriend saying, as he came out of the office.

"We'll get patrol cars out as soon as possible. If we see her, we'll get her home safely." Said an officer.

"Thank you so much." My boyfriend smiled, before turning and getting in my car, with his friend.

I watched them drive away, and heard the officer give orders to patrol the area, and giving them all a description of me. Then I snuck back into the shadows, before running towards my friends house. Of course after running for a few minutes, I realized a small problem. I came to halt, and thought about this for a minute, then I ran towards a goal. After running for about thirty minutes, I pulled out my phone and dialed a number.

"Hello?" Asked the sleepy voice on the other line.

"Meet me at our spot. Now." I ordered, already turning around, and heading towards an abandon house, on the outskirts of town.

"What's going on?" She asked, sounding more awake.

"I'll explain later. Hurray, and make sure you're not being followed." I stated, hanging up, before she could another word. Then I rushed towards the house. Luckily there was a spot across from the abandon house, where I could hid out, while I waited for her to get here.

I got there with in a few minutes, and quickly went to the hiding spot only I knew about.

I ducked low, and turned my phone off. Knowing that the police could track it if it was on, and someone tried to call me. I didn't have to wait to much longer before, I saw headlight coming. I sighed a quick breath of relief, glad my friend made it here, before anything could happen. But my relief only lasted a few seconds before I saw that she was alone. I saw another car pulling up beside her. Luckily, their backs were towards me.

"I'm sure. She called and told me to meet her here." I heard my friend telling someone.

"Let's find her." I heard my boyfriend say.

I silently swore under my breath. I hadn't thought to tell her not to involve anyone. I was hoping that she would just hurray here, and not worry about calling anyone else. But of course when it came to me, she worried like a mother or a sister would.

"She might already be inside." She stated, before disappearing inside the empty house, followed by the two people I now didn't trust.

I waited for the time to past, hoping for the best. I thought that all was going well, when I saw all three of them exit the house. I gave another sigh of relief that nothing happened to her. I could see them, underneath a light that was still working talking, my boyfriend and his friend looking pissed off. While my friend was looking confused and worry. Suddenly my boyfriend, took a gun from behind his back. And pointed it at my friends head. Now I could see her scared. Holding her hand out, showing that she wasn't a threat. Then there was a bang, just before her body fell to the ground. I quickly stuffed my wrist into my mouth, before any sound could come out. Then I bit down, to keep quiet. Then I saw the other guy go to her car, and take something out of it. The key. Of course. Then I saw them quickly drive away, in my car. I waited for a few more moments, before stepping out. I went over to my friend, but already knew it was to late to save her. I reached down, and searched her pockets. Knowing she always had an extra key on her just incase she locked her other set inside. Which happened more then once.

Once I found her key, inside her left side bra cup, I got into her car. And started it up. Then I drove out of this town, and headed straight for freedom.

I drove straight through to the next three town, not stopping once. And only taking the back roads until I had to drive on the freeway. Once I hit that, I drove as fast as possible with out getting pulled over. Luckily, my friend had refilled her car, and had a full tank when I got in. When the light came on, I drove up to my bank, glad it was now almost eight in the morning, and went to the ATM. Where I pulled some money out. Then I went to the gas station, where I filled up. Then I drove to the closest McDonalds and got breakfast from the drive-thru.

Once I was on the road again. I took off, towards the airport.

**TBC...**

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**Now I know that there's no name for any of the characters. But I have a reason for not naming them! You'll find out the main character's name in the next chapter I promise. As for the other three characters, (boyfriend, other guy, and friend) They won't be named until later. Again it's because of the plot that they have no names! Not because I couldn't come up with any. **

**UNTIL NEXT TIME! **


	2. Moving On

**A/N There is a little swearing, and mention of self harming. You have been warn! **

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Chapter Two

Moving On

Five Years Later…..

I had just walked through the doors and was heading straight towards my desk. My music was on, and loud. I noticed Morgan's mouth moving, so I unplugged on ear.

"Sorry, what was that?" I asked as I sat my stuff down, taking my jacket off.

"I said, what are you listening to? I can hear it all the way over here." He replied, leaning back in his chair, as I took my other earphone out, and turn the music device off.

"Oh, it's country. Sorry." I stated, turning my computer on, as I sat down.

"Another bad night?" Asked Reid.

"Nope." I stated, already getting into my case files.

"Claire bear, you're not fooling us." Morgan stated with a smile in his voice.

"If you mean another sleepless night, then you're right. But that doesn't mean it was another bad night." I stated, not once looking up from my case file. "Besides I'm use to sleepless nights." I whispered under my breath.

Most of the next couple of hours we kept to ourselves. Unless one of us had something about a case that we couldn't remember. Then we asked Wonder Boy Reid. I had been here in the FBI for about a year now. And the other four were spent getting here. Now most people wanted to join for obvious reasons. They were sick of seeing the bad guys getting away with stuff. They didn't find any other jobs as exciting. They were recommended. This is what they've wanted to do since they started college.

Me? It was my way of coping with what happened five years ago. It was my way of finding the courage to go after the two people who I trusted the most, just to have them turn into monsters. Of course back then I was just another pretty blonde. But over the years, I've gotten into better shape, colored my hair an auburn red, and went from geek glasses to contacts. Looking at old pictures, you could barely tell that I was the same girl.

Ever since I saw my best friend get killed right in front of me, I've sworn that I would get justice for her. I moved across the country. All the way from Utah. All because I was scared of two guys. Now? No guys scares me. Okay maybe one. Aaron Hotchner. My boss. My very attractive male boss. But nonetheless, he's only scary because he's always so serious. Which isn't to unreasonable. I mean an unsub killed his wife just a few years ago. And he killed the unsub, because he threaten to kill Hotch's son. I'm sure if I had a kid, I would have done the same thing.

But people move on. Take Hotch for example. He's now dating a girl name Beth Cooper. Bitch. God I hate her. It's not because she's a bitch really. I just hate her. No real reason. I mean come on, every one's got to move on right? So I should be happy that Hotch has. And honestly I am happy that he's not still mopping over his dead ex-wife. But that doesn't mean that I like the girl he's currently dating. 'Cause I don't.

"Hey guys." Beth smiled, when lunch came around.

"Hey Beth." I murmured, not looking up.

"Hey here for some lunch time with the boss man?" Morgan teased, as he started to stretch out his back and arms.

"Well him and the team of course." She stated, smiling away like she always does.

_Of course. _I thought, as I rolled my eyes.

"Beth. I thought you were going to meet us at the restaurant." I heard Hotch stated, with a smile in his voice. Bitch.

"Well I was, but I thought that I would just catch up with you guys here." She answered, just before I heard a kissing sound.

Gross! I grabbed my backpack, and snuck out towards the restroom, with out any one really noticing me. I went into a stall, and quickly got undressed, and changing into my teal tank top, and black exercise shorts. Then went to the sink and pulled my dark hair into a high pony tail. Once I got my work clothes folded nicely into my backpack, I headed back out.

"Well are we ready then?" I heard Rossi ask, as I came back into the room.

"Almost, Garcia is going to meet us here." Stated Morgan, as I put my bag on my chair, and pulled my music device back out of my purse.

"Well where are you going?" Asked Morgan, after giving a small whistle.

"Running." I replied. "Have a good lunch." taking off towards the stairs. I started running down the stairs. Then out the front door. Luckily we had an hour and half of a lunch break. Which gave me an hour to run, and an half hour to get back and quickly shower, before I had to work again.

I had my fast pace music Playlist playing, while I ran around the block. Every since that night, I made it a personal goal to keep in shape. Even though it's a requirement to even be in the FBI, I don't want to be out of shape. Even for a little while. It was also a personal goal to get better and faster. When I first started, it took the whole lunch break to get around the block. Now I can finish the block with in an hour. Getting faster and faster each time. One minute at a time that is. But it's still a minute faster then before.

While I was running, I couldn't help but remember that horrible night. When I found out the truth about my ex-boyfriend. I had been dating him for about two years. And I never thought or knew he was capable of doing such horrible things. Of course when he brought that one girl home, that last night. I knew that he wasn't the same man I met years before. What hurt the most is that, had she stuck with me, she would still be alive. And not six feet under a headstone. But she thought I was with him. Which I was in a sense, but not in the way she had thought.

But instead of trying to listen to me, she took off screaming. And I wasn't going to follow. Otherwise I would be next to her. And in all honesty I'm glad I'm not next to her. Though I have my days when I wish my best friend was still with me. The first two years of living on my own out here, were hard. And I admit I had my dark times, where I cut myself just to feel something other then the pain of lost. And when it got really bad, I tried to kill myself. Of course it was just easy stuff like trying to overdose on sleeping pills, or something like that. But it never worked.

And of course I still have those days. Especially right after a night of the memories of that night. Like yesterday, I came home and crashed on my couch, it was about seven pm when I got home and I was tired beyond belief. So I did what I thought was a good idea. I fell asleep. Only to wake less then an hour later screaming and sweating. Luckily I live in a house, so it wasn't to bad. Didn't disturb any of my neighbors. But it was horrible enough, that I did end up cutting again. Now I know that cutting's a bad thing. And it was the first time in months. Of course, though, now my wrists hurt. And I was regretting the idea of doing so. Cause everytime I wrote, or typed or did anything that required me moving my wrists, pain shot up. And I would grimace, and when one of my co-workers asked about it, I blamed it on an old wrist injury. Which if you really think about it, it's not technically a lie. Cause the injury was already a few hours old, making it old. And I didn't just cover my bleeding wrist in gaze. I covered them in gaze, then covered the gaze with a wrist brace.

I was just coming back up to the front of the building, when I checked my time. 00:45:56:05. Not bad, almost forty-six minutes. I bent over trying to catch my breath. After about two minutes, I walked through the doors, and headed up to my desk. I grabbed my bag, and went to the training floor, where the gym and showers were. Once I got to the locker room, I got undressed, wrapped myself in a towel then stuffed my stuff in the locker. Before I headed over to the showers. Where I quickly washed off all the sweat and salt. I washed my hair real fast, with water and a little soap, then ran the bar of soap all down my body.

Five minutes later, I was back in the locker room, drying the rest of my body off.

Applying deodorant, make up, and perfume. Then I quickly glanced around the room, to make sure no one was in, before quickly working on reapplying fresh gaze to my wrists. Once that was taken care of, I got dressed, combed my hair, then pulled it back in a braid. Once I was presentable again, I stuffed everything back into my bag, and walked out, with one earphone in my ear. I once I got to the office again I noticed that no one from my team was back from lunch break yet.

**TBC...**

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**Here's the next chapter! I hope you enjoyed it. Feedback is loved!**


	3. Bar Night

_**A/N Here's another chapter! Sorry it's been a little while since my last update. But ENJOY!**_

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Chapter Three

Bar Night

Five hours later, we were all turning in our files, one by one, giving them to Hotch.

I was the fifth one to give mine to him. I walked up to his door, knocked once, and walked in when he answered. I handed the files to him, wishing him a good night.

"Claire." Hotch called, in his silky voice.

"Yeah?" I questioned, turning to face him again.

"The team was talking about hitting up a bar tonight, you should join us." He stated, looking up at me through his lashes.

"Is that an invite, or an order?" I joked, smiling.

"Does it need to be?" He asked, with a small smile.

"I guess not." I answered, walking out.

I walked down the stairs heading towards my desk, when I saw Garcia running down the cat walk.

"I have found _the _perfect place, for tonight." She stated, her face glowing with joy, as if the smile on her face wasn't enough evidence that she was in a great mood.

"Awesome!" Exclaimed Emily, as she was slipping her arms into her jacket.

"Where?" Ask JJ, doing the same as Emily.

"It's called, Club 22." Garcia, she answered as she received a hug from Morgan.

"Where is it?" Asked JJ, with a smile. As she gestured to her outfit.

"Oh right, Sorry, its…" Garcia started to say, when my phone rang.

I glanced at the caller id, and left it alone.

"…So after every one changes, we'll all meet up there at 7pm." She finished, her voice all high with excitement. "And everyone is to be there. Is that clear?" She finished though she was only looking at me.

"No worries, it's been ordered that I be present." I smiled, as I grabbed my things.

"Good." She replied, as she bounced away, all happy and giddy like.

After we all gathered our things, we went our separate ways towards our vehicles. Then we each drove our own way. I drove to my place singing along to Carrie Underwood's newest CD. I had the speakers blasting, as I drove by Hotch, who was giving Reid a ride home. I gave them each a wave, and drove through the light. I lived about fifteen minutes from my work. So getting home didn't take that long. On a normal day/night, I would stop at the store, or drive thru to get some food. But since we had all decided on the bar tonight, I skipped that.

When I got up, I pulled into my driveway, and parked my Audi. Turned the car off, and jumped out with my purse and jacket in hand. I quickly walked to my door, and unlocked the door. I walked in, closing the door behind me, and went straight to my room. Once in there, I throw my purse and jacket on my desk chair, and went over to my walk-in closet. Where I pushed all my clothes to the back, before flipping through each item. After looking at every piece of clothing that was hung up, I decided on a mini teal blue country dress, with a neutral colored belt, white legging, and light brown knee high, high heel boots. Then I took my braid out, and flipped my hair three times, allowing my hair to flow down my back. I walked over to my bathroom, and looked in the mirror. After deciding that my outfit and hair was cute, I pulled out my makeup. Normally I only do eyeliner on the bottom line, and mascara on the lashes for work. But since we were going out, I decided to do black smoky-eye makeup as well. Along with my medium shade of pink lip gloss.

After I was completely ready, I shut off all the lights, grabbed my iPod, phone, keys, and wallet from my bed. Then throw my items into a small black purse, that I use for dates, and going out. Then I walked out of my room, shutting the door behind me, and out the of house. I locked the door, before turning to car, and unlocking it with remote on my keychain. Then I climbed in, and turned it out, pulling out of my drive way. Again my Carrie Underwood CD was playing, as I drove to the bar that we were all meeting at. Once I reached the place, I parked my car, and pulled my cell phone out and sent a text to Garcia

_Here. Where r u guys ?_

_Inside Ill send 1der boy over 2 the door 2 meet u_

KK c u soon

I placed my phone back into my purse, and got out of my car. Then I walked over to the door, with my I.D. in hand. I had just shown the bouncer my card, when I saw Reid reach the door. He was smiling, as he waved to me.

"Hey." I smiled, as I went up to him.

"Hey, You look great." He smiled, as he lead the way to the others.

"Is everyone else here?" I asked.

"Almost, Hotch and Beth still haven't shown up. But Hotch sent Garcia a text about five minutes ago, saying they were on their way over." He answered, just as we reached the team.

"Hey there Claire Bear." Smiled Morgan, as he got up from the table, and gave me a hug.

"Hey guys." I smiled, completely happy and relaxed. Which usually happens after a case.

"Oh goody. Hotch just sent a text. He and Beth just pulled up." Garcia stated, already sending another text.

"I'll meet them at the door." Stated Morgan, who had stated to walked away.

After Morgan went over to the door, I got up from my chair, and went over to the bar. I waited my turn to order my favorite kind of drink. I saw Morgan, Hotch, and Beth all walk in together laughing. They all waved at me as they went to the table. When the bartender turn towards me, he used an award winning smile as he asked my I.D. I quickly pulled it out from my wallet.

"Clarissa Portola. That's a wonderful name." He stated, as he handed my I.D. back. "So love, what can I get for you?" leaning on the countertop.

"A Pina Coloda please." I answered, glancing around the bar.

"Alright, give me a few seconds and I'll have that out to you." He stated, as he turned away and started to mix my drink and another one. After a few seconds the bartender turned and faced me. "Here you are." He said, "That'll be four-fifty." He smiled.

I as about to get my cash out, when someone else placed money on the countertop, I looked up too see who was paying.

"Keep the change." The guy in front of me said. As he turned his body towards me.

"Thank you. But you really didn't need to do that." I stated honestly, as I looked at him. He had dark brown hair, with green hairs. His hair was spiked, he wasn't wearing any kind of jewelry, his outfit was simple but fitting. Not in the sense that it was over tight, but it was tight enough that you could tell that he was in shape.

"Hey no need for that." He smiled, as he looked relaxed some more. "So tell me sweet heart, who are you here with?" He asked, as he looked around the room.

"I'm with those people over there." I replied as I pointed to my group.

"Oh, I see. So tell me are they going to miss you, if I steal you and your attention for the next little while?" His smile not faulting once.

"I don't know. Maybe you should ask." I stated, smiling back, waiting to see what he would do.

He smiled, then glanced at my team. "Wait here." He stated, before walking away.

I was in totally shock as I saw him walk over to my team, and stopped in front of their table.

**TBC...**

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**Hope you enjoyed it. **


	4. What A Night

**A/N And here's the next chapter! :) Enjoy!**

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**Chapter Four**

**What A Night**

I waited to see what was going to happen next. I saw Hotch and Morgan glance at me, while the ladies all smiled and giggled. After a minute or two, the guy started to walk back towards me. When he reached the stool right next to me he smiled.

"They're fine with it, as long as you are." He answered, as he sat down.

I took a sip of my drink, I glanced at my team who were all looking at me. "Well before we go any further lets start off with names." I stated, taking another sip.

"Nathan Grimes." He replied, flagging the bartender down for another draft of beer. "And you are?" He asked, as the bartender laid another beer in front of him.

"Clarissa Portola." I answered.

"Well Clarissa, I don't know about you. But I'm up for a game of Pool." He answered, as he nodded towards a free table.

"Let's see those skills." I replied, smirking and walking over towards the table.

I let him rack up the balls, as I chalked my stick and waited for him to finish. When he was done, we made bets. His was that if he won, I had to tell him something about me. Mine as if I won he had to sing karaoke. I took the first shot, landing two solids in the left corner pocket.

We switched off and on, while the one played the other would watch, talk and drink. Waiting for their turn. When it came, they would line the balls up, aim, and shot. We were both aiming for the eight ball, about fifteen minutes later. It was his turn, so I told him I was going to get another drink. I went up to the bar, and glanced back, to see him planning on how to hit the ball so that it went into a pocket. The bartender was currently with a couple of girls, who couldn't decide what drink to get. So he was trying to figure out what they wanted.

I was still watching Nathan, when I heard someone come up behind me. I didn't turn to look though. Just figuring it was another costumer waiting for their drink order as well. As I was watching Nathan, I saw him shot the ball, and miss. He was less then an inch off from the right corner pocket. It hit the edge of the table, and rolled towards the middle of the table.

"What can I get you?" I heard the bartender asking the person next to be.

"Uh, I believe she was here first." I heard the other person say, in a familiar voice.

"Sweetheart." Called the bartender.

I turned to focus, on the server. "Strawberry daiquiri this time please." I answered, when I got a glimpse of the person next to me.

"I never figured you for a rum drinker." Stated Beth.

"Oh, what did you have me pinned as?" I asked, though I wouldn't look at her.

"Something less bitter honestly." She answered, with a smile in her voice.

"I drink mixed drinks. But they only have Rum, or Vodka in them. But they're all fruity and sweet." I answered, just as the bartender gave me my drink. He told me the price, so I got the money out while he was taking Beth's order.

"…and the dark beer that you have." She stated, pulling out her money.

"Which one sweetheart?" He asked, pointing to the beers.

"I don't remember the name. It's for my boyfriend over there." She stated, pointing at Hotch who was talking to Rossi.

"Cutthroat." I stated so that bartender could hear, placing the money on the counter and walking away.

"That's the one!" I heard Beth say.

I got to the table, where Nathan was sitting. I made a joke, of why he hadn't kept playing. In which he replied he never takes something that wasn't his. We both laughed at that, as I grabbed my stick. I lined the stick up with the ball. Called out my corner and shot. The ball rolled across the table, and about half an inch from the hole, stopped.

"No, no, no, no! Come on! Really?" I exclaimed though it was jokingly.

"Oh, so sad. Better get ready to spill something." Stated Nathan, as he got into position and shot at the ball.

But he hit the ball to hard, that it went the other way after hitting the corners.

"You suck." I state, with a smile on my face. "Less then an inch, and you can't make it." I laugh, be he just smiles and waves me to the table.

I shot to the ball again, calling for the left corner pocket. This time it went in. I laughed, and took a sip of my drink, as he asked what song he should sing. I told him to pick his favorite. So with that, he went over to the DJ. While we waited for his turn, we decided to play another round.

This time he kept the same stakes from him, but I changed mine, and matched his. So that whoever lost they had to share something. Then he racked the balls up again, and took the first shot. We were about half way though the game, when I glanced at the clock.

"I should get going." I stated, drinking the last of my second drink.

"But we're not finished." Nathan stated, after he took his shot.

"Still, I got to go."

"Well here, at least give me a call, or a text." He stated, as he wrote down his number on a napkin.

"We'll see. Later." I replied, as I walked away. I was just about to go out the door, when Beth came up to me.

"Hey thanks for your help on the beer." She smiled as she continued to walk towards the restrooms.

Thank goodness she didn't stay and wait for a reply. Because I didn't have any good ones to give to her. I walked to my car, and got in. after buckling my seatbelt, and turning it on. I pulled out of the parking lot and went home. As I was pulling out, I saw that all of my team was still here.

I drove straight home, once I got there, I went right inside. I locked the front door behind me, and went into my room. Where I played my messages on my home phone. While those were playing, I went to my bathroom, and got ready for bed.

I had just brushed my teeth when a family voice came on the line.

"Hey Sis, it's me you're brother. It's been while since we last saw each other. I know it's hard for you get days off work. But I'm flying in, in a week for work. And thought it would be a good idea to meet up. I know it's been hard with out mom and dad around. But I think we should catch up. Call me."

_Beep. End of messages._

I looked at the time, and figured that my brother would be asleep by now, which meant, it was to late to call. So figuring that it was late enough, and we could be called in at any given moment, I changed into my pajamas and got ready for bed. Then I climbed into my twin size bed, pulled the covers over myself. As I laid in bed, thousands if not millions of thought ran through my head. After sometime of thinking about every possible thing I could. I fell asleep.

**TBC...**

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**Let me know what you think!**


	5. Just Another Case

**A/N And here's chapter five ENJOY!**

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**Chapter Five**

**Just Another Case**

_Ring. Ring. Ring._

"Hello?" I stated sleepily into the speaker.

"We've got a case." The voice of my boss said.

"Where?" I asked, as I pulled the covers off my body.

"Stockton, Utah. Grab you're to go bag, and meet us at the office." He ordered. "Claire?" He questioned after about a minute, when I didn't reply back.

"Ya, no I'll be there. Bye." I quickly answered, hanging up my line.

I sat there on the edge of my bed, thinking of what to do. I can't call in sick that's a for sure thing. But, having to go back there? It would only take a day or two until the team finds out what happened to me, five years ago. I've been so careful to keep it a secret. And all for what? For them to learn the truth about why I am who I am. Five years, and haven't been on a date. Five years, I live alone, and never have a single guest in my place. I of course have people asking for donations and other things. Of course, they never set foot past the door. Five years, I hid the past. Buried deep inside my mind. Never to reach the surface. Until now. Now the gates are about to flood open.

After getting ready, I grabbed my to go bag, along with my purse. Then I walked out of my room, closing the door. Went to the kitchen, grabbed a soda from the fridge, along with a pack of pop tarts from the cupboard. After that, I grabbed my keys off of the side table right by the door. Then I opened the door, and turned to look at my current house one last time before walking out the door. I closed and locked the door behind myself. Then got into my car and drove to work.

Normally when I drive to work, I listen to some kind of music that upbeat and dance-y. But today, the song I choose was Apologize by One Republic. It was on repeat, as I drove to work. When I got to the parking lot, I saw Prentiss walking to the doors. I waved as I went to park my car. I quickly got out, and ran up to the doors. I took the stairs, all the way to the BAU office. Once there, I rushed to the round room. Where I could see the rest the team in the room. I walked in, shutting the door behind myself.

"Everything okay?" Rossi asked as he watched me sit down.

"Sure." I answered, as I pulled the tablet close to me. I opened the flap and started to read the file. "Are we going to stare at me, or save people?" I asked with out looking up from the tablet.

"Ten girls have been killed in the last five years." Stated Garcia as we started. "Two girls are taken each year. The first is taken and kept the first week of May." She continued, as she clicked her remote and pictures started to come onto the screen. "They're taken the first and found dead on the seventh of May. Then found on the seventh of May, naked bruised and broken. Each of the them, found like this." She finished as she clicked her remote again.

"It looks like the unsub just threw the girls. Rather than just dump them."

"You, my prince, would be correct." Garcia replied towards Morgan, as she clicked the remote. "Moving on, the other five girls are taken the seventh of July. And found on the eight." She replied as more pictures showed up.

"Are we sure it's the same unsub?" Reid asked, as he looked at the pictures that were displayed on the screen.

"It seems like it could be two." JJ supplied, as she too was looking at the pictures.

"The first girls, are kept for a week. Exactly seven days." Prentiss starts.

"The second girls, are taken and killed the same day." Morgan states.

"Look at the second set of girls." Reid stated, getting up out of his chair. "They're wounds are more over killed. The first set, have less wounds." Reid pointed to the girls on the right side of the screen.

"Look at this. The first set of girls all have black hair, blue eyes and glasses. The second set are all Blonde, blue eyed, but no glasses."

"There's no way, it's only one person. It has to be a team." Stated Rossi.

"It is." I whispered.

"What?" Asked JJ, who was sitting me right next me.

"Nothing." I replied, clearing my throat.

"Garcia I want you to come with us. Wheels up in thirty. Rossi a word." Hotch stated as he pushed away from the table. The rest of the team slowly got up from the table. Prentiss had stated that she needed to go get her to go bag. While JJ had excused herself to go call her husband and son. Morgan went with Garcia to help her pack up her computers and supplies. Reid left reading some more of the file. I was the last one in the room. I heard two guys talking, when Hotch and Rossi came into the room. I heard one of them close the door, as the other sat next to me. I knew that they came to talk to me. Since I hadn't change much of my past. Just my last name, taking up my mothers maiden name instead of my given last name. Other than that, and my appearance, I was the same girl. Born and raised in Tooele Utah.

"We've noticed that we'll be going to your hometown." Rossi started off, while I notice Hotch standing in front of me as he watched and profiled me.

"Yes." I replied, still watching Hotch.

"We'd understand if you want to sit this one out." Rossi continued.

"No." I stated pushing away from the table and standing up. "I'm going." Then I left the room.

I don't know what was going on. Was I more upset that they didn't trust me, in my hometown? Or the fact that I was given a chance to back out and get stronger before confronting my monsters, and didn't. Taking that as a sign of weakness.? I think not. No if I have to face the monsters this year, this month, this week. Then so be it. I will.

I grabbed my car keys off the desk, and headed out to my car. On the way down to my car, I couldn't help to think that going would mean the team would find out who I really am. Which was something I didn't want. But was it because I wasn't ready? Or because I didn't want to be her anymore? Either way, I knew one thing was for sure. I was sick of hiding from the monsters.

Once I reached my car, I popped the trunk, and pulled my to go bag out. Then shut the trunk. All the way down, memories of that horrible night keep popping up in my mind. Of the house I had been living in. Of all the things I left behind, (of course most if not all of it was replaced now). Of the friends I had made, and ran from. I knew that going back, meant breaking the walls down. It meant, all the fear was going to show. All the emotions I blocked out, were going to come back with full force. I kept my heart shut down. Never got to close to anyone. Even the team, I would make lame excuses to why I could hang out. Such as "I have other plans with some old friends." "I've got family in from out of town." "A friend just got married, I missed the wedding, do to the case. So I want to go say hi, and give them my wishes." "I've got a volunteer thing tonight. Can't miss it." So forth and so on. And now, they're going to discover the truth to why I keep turning them down.

Will they hate me when they do? Or will they understand? And if they understand, will they push me to let them in? Or will they leave me be and let me come around myself? Have I already lost any chance of building a friendship with any of them?  
I just got to the elevator when I saw the rest of the team in it. "We're all ready to go then?" I asked, looking at their to go bags.

"Yup, everyone had their bags at their desk. Garcia didn't need to pack much either since she didn't unpack anything but the computers from the last time she was with us." Stated Morgan.

"But that was months ago." I replied, as I walked with them to the jet.

"Well I have duplicates of all the hookups, mouse's, keyboards, and such. I only have the few laptops that you see." Garcia smiled.

After that we kept quite, as we walked to the jet. Once we got to it, we all boarded and sat next to each other. Morgan, JJ, Reid, and Garcia took up the four-person table area. Rossi, and Prentiss sat across from them in the two-person area. Hotch stood behind Rossi. While I stood behind Reid. Once we were airborne, we got right to the case.;

"The stab wounds are quick and easy. Which suggests he's skilled. He's done this before." Morgan started off.

"Well of course he had. He's been doing this for five years." Stated Prentiss. "What gets me, is the dramatic change between the victims. From dark hair, to light. From slightly blind, to 20-20 vision."

"They all have the same body type though." Reid spoke up. "They're all slim, and about the same height."

"Alright, Reid and Claire, I want you guys to go to the station and get set up. Reid see if you can find the comfort zone. We only have two days to find the guy before he kidnaps another victim. Claire I want you to see if you can link the victims. Garcia, I want you to tear their lives up. Find out why they were targeted. JJ I want you to make sure this stays out of the press. Rossi and Prentiss I want to you talk to the families. See who their friends and enemies were. Morgan you and I will go to the crime scenes and see what we can find from there." Hotch stated. "We'll be landing in about an hour." Hotch stated, as he closed his file and walked to the back of the jet.

I laid down on the couch, pulled my phone from my pocket, and started to play a game.

**TBC...**

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**So I know I've got a few people reading this. But I want to know, if I should keep going. Or if it's really not that good...**

**Let me know what you think!**


	6. Update

Hey guys so I know it's been a long time since my last update. I just wanted you all to know that my old computer crashed and died. The very same one that had my writing on it. :( But I am working on recovering the contents that were on the hard drive. Which were the first chapter of the sequel story of It's Always Been You, Hotch and Reid, called The Dark Secrets Of Aaron Hotchner. It also had the next chapter for Secrets And Lies, Hotch and OC. Along with the new chapter/rewrite for my story For The Love Of A Daughter, Hotch and Prentiss. I'm getting a part that will be able to take the contents from my old computer and put it on the new one I just recently gotten. The part should be here in about a week. and should only take about a day or two to transfer the contents from the old hard drive, and put it on the new computer/hard drive. So here's to hoping it will work. If it doesn't work for whatever reason, Then I will be very upset, but will do my best to update those next chapters from memory as best as I can.

Wish me luck!


	7. Authors Note

Just want to let you all know I'm still here and alive. However so far no luck getting the other chapters from my other (dead) computer. :( Also just so that you all know. I haven't had the time to write, because I'm in the middle of moving once more. I'll have internet for three more days. Well more like two more days. So I will try to post at least one or two chapters from Secrets and Lies tonight or tomorrow night if I have the time. I'm working on the next chapter now. And just a heads up, my new place won't have internet. At least not for a little while, until my roommate and I found out where we are with money and such.

Anyways, the next chapter for sure will be posted here soon. I will try to get at least two or three up by the time I move out. But only time will tell.


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